bellies!

This past weekend we had a not-a-shower for my friend Janet (on the right in the white shirt). She's just over ten weeks ahead of me in the whole baby making process and since this is their second, she claimed she didn't need a real shower. She and her husband said that the only thing they needed were diapers so people just brought tons of those as gifts. We did a basic potluck with S. African style pancakes (something like a cross between a crepe and those massive Ethiopian pancakes) and fillings. It was co-ed and we didn't do baby games like guessing what candy bar someone had mashed into a disposable diaper and everyone had a great time.

It was also the first time I got to see my friend Leo (on the left) since she recently found out that she is now expecting as well and is due about ten weeks after I am. Both Janet and Leo work at the college and it didn't occur to them that if they hired a bunch of female faculty in their 30's we would all start getting pregnant. At least the hr folks are getting really good at dealing with maternity leave.

I know I'm wearing essentially a bag shaped dress so we also took a photo from the side with Janet's husband Curt pulling my dress tight so you can see that there really is a belly under there. The butt sticking out in back is also a hint that there is WAY more up front than my poor spine is used to handling.


So here we all are at about 3.5, 5.5 and 7.5 months.

5 months!

So I hit five months this week. It's amazing how fast time is passing. Helena is kicking up a storm and no one is embarrassed to ask when I'm due because it's obvious that I'm pregnant at this point.

In fact, that's the oddest bit about it all. None of this process has gone the way I expected. So many women romanticize their pregnancies, even after the fact, that I did assume certain things would happen that just haven't. Granted I also assumed I'd have terrible morning sickness and managed to skip that as well fortunately.

However, these days the thing that impacts me the most is body dismorphia. I'll catch a glimpse of my profile as I walk past a mirror or a window and just think, "What the hell?" I do not recognize myself anymore when I catch glimpses out of the corner of my eye. I know I look pregnant but the reality is a very different thing. I've never fantasized about being pregnant or how I would look so this is all of a bit of a shock to the system even if I knew it would happen intellectually.

It has got me back to knitting finally though. I'll post photos as I finish things. Not everything is for Helena though. It seems that my world is full of pregnant women these days so I have many babies for whom to knit over the next several months.